Out of respect for my father, I will not use my family structure as an example -- and will speak on general terms.
The most damaging aspect of the message (in my opinion) is the breakdown of the family structure by changing the woman's place in the home to a structure that is contrary to scripture. Man is the king, woman is the servant.
This is harsh, and many may disagree, but they have never truly stopped to consider the major issues. Most message men feel that they are the only decision makers, and that the women are not to be involved. Women are not to discuss scripture, or more importantly the way of the 'prophet.'
The KJV-only ministers take the verse regarding "wives subject to their husbands" completely out of context, assuming "subject" is the lowly in the presence of the king.
Let's review the supporting scripture:
Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be externalâ€”the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wearâ€” but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.
--1 Peter 3:1-6
Notice, not only does this scripture apply towards the inward nature of the heart in marriage, it applies to the inward beauty of your wives. This scripture is also used for the "modest apparel" doctrines, but the ministers "glaze over" the part about "braiding their hair."
The worst part? The message women are led to oppression and fear. They are afraid to speak up in the homes. Notice the last verse, "You [women] are her [Sarah's] children if you do good ... and do not fear!"
Having spoken to several men and women who are now leaving the cult, all have practically the same story to tell. The love of God was not in the structure of their family while the wife was treated like a servant.
I'm interested to hear the thoughts of others here. What are your opinions on 1 Peter 3?